Why wouldn’t it be? We provide a free lottery ticket courier service, Lishus Courier (which is what shows up on your credit card statement) and charge a nominal subscription fee (nominal? It’s downright cheap actually for what you get. Hey Mark check with accounting maybe we need to raise the price) for our software that tracks all your play, players in your pool and notifies you when you win. It’s the most awesome way to purchase lottery tickets and manage your lottery play ever invented! And we’re modest too
Is lottery pooling legal?
No. We’ve spent thousands of dollars and countless hours developing LottoLishus because we want to go to jail! Wait a minute, wrong answer, it’s YES, of course it’s legal. In fact it’s encouraged on many state lottery websites. Most jackpots are won by friends, family or coworkers pooling together to increase their chances of winning. So quit being a worry wart. Get your buddies together and join the only Universe that could make you a millionaire!
How does the pool work?
When we have a million people playing in the pool, which we will someday, each person will get 1/1,000,000 of the winning ticket, sound good? Naw, we didn’t think so either. In fact, unlike an office lottery pool where all the winnings are split evenly, we wanted to reward the smart guy/gal who was so brilliant as to pick the winning numbers. That’s why in LottoLishus the person who picks the winning numbers gets to keep 50% of the cash winnings!
Now we’ve got 50% left over, what do we do with it? We keep it of course! Of course NOT! The other 50% gets paid out using our patented, lottery pool payout system. Ten 5% winning shares go to other players in the pool. If the winner was in your personal pool, you automatically win a 5% share. If the winner was in someone else’s personal pool you could win a 5% share with a Meteor Strike.
So let’s recap because this is the #1 question we get. Every winning ticket is split just 11 ways using our patented, lottery pool payout system:
50% goes to the person that picked the winning numbers
Ten 5% shares (50% total) go to other players in the pool.
If the winner was in your personal pool, you automatically win a 5% share.
If the winner was in someone else’s personal pool you could win a 5% share with a Meteor Strike.
LottoLishus keeps not one thin cent of the winnings, nadda, zippo. And because of our brilliant patented pooling payout system, the LottoLishus lottery pool can grow to include every person on the planet and never dilute the winning shares for the players! How would you like a chance to win the lottery with 7 billion tickets in your lottery pool? Let’s find out!
Why pool with LottoLishus?
Number one, it’s fun! Two, our software and service make it incredibly easy and convenient. Three, unlike a traditional pool where the more people that are in it the more ways the winnings are split, our unique design limits the split to just 11 ways. Four, because of our unique pooling split the more people that enter, the more chances everyone has to win! Five, because it’s FUN! Oh, already said that one…well…it is.
Do you sell me the lottery tickets?
No, no, no. of course not. That would be silly. We’re NOT in the business of selling lottery tickets. We have no direct or indirect relationship with the lottery, although if one were offered we’d consider it…hello lottery commission. We actually just provide a free courier service, Intergalactic Courier, that saves you all the headache of running to the store, standing in line, storing your ticket, checking it to see if you won anything, going back to the store to redeem your $2 winner and do it all over again. Whew! (Hey Mark, that seems like a lot of work for $7.99, are you sure we can make some money at this thing?) A Mega Millions ticket costs a buck, $1, and a Powerball ticket costs $2 and that’s what we charge you (again, how are we making money?). Now if you’d like to pay us a little something extra, you know, like a tip, that could be arranged. My name is Dave, my address is…just kidding.
How do I know you purchased a ticket for me?
You just have to trust us on this one. Seriously, remember when a handshake was good enough, now we need all these lawyers for the simplest things, sheesh. Actually our attorneys didn’t think the handshake would cut it either, especially since we’ll, unfortunately, never meet you in real life…unless, of course, you win the big one. Then we’ll be BFF’s! So the buzzkill’s, I mean the legal department, said to store a digital facsimile of all your tickets which are accessible through your player dashboard. The physical copy is stored in our secure facility while awaiting potential redemption. Hopefully for that big one…wink wink my BFF!
Can I play the lottery if I am not a US citizen or resident?
If you’re breathing, can reach the internet, are over 18, like to have fun and like the thrill of possibly changing your life financially then yes…as a citizen of this universe you can join our LottoLishus Universe.
What do I need to start playing?
Simple, you need to be age 18, have internet access and a valid credit card. Oh, and the ability to pick the jackpot winning numbers is helpful too but not necessary.
How often are lottery drawings?
Here’s the great news, we play Mega Millions and Powerball, you know, the lottery’s that have nine out of ten largest jackpots ever which regularly top $400 million (think that could change your life a bit. Yeah, ya think?). Anyway, you have four chances every week, Tuesday and Friday for Mega Millions and Powerball on Wednesday and Saturday night for a life altering event to occur. Great news, if you join and play with LottoLishus you don’t have to do a dang thing except pick your numbers from the convenience of just about any digital device with internet access and make sure your credit card is good. We do EVERYTHING else for you. Just like your Mommy when you were a baby. Waaah. But no, YOU will be the happiest baby ever because you could win a boatload of cash!
How will I know if I won anything?
Seriously, you didn’t ask that question in today’s age of oversaturated communication channels. You pick it and we’ll let ya know. How about them apples?
How do I collect winnings?
We’ll meet you in a dark alley with a dark briefcase. I’ll give you the high sign and you’ll give me the secret password. Wait, that sounds like the movie I watched the other night. What’s that one with you know who. Aw anyway…it’s part of our awesome service. You don’t have to do a darn thing except tell us what to do with it when we collect it if for you. You’ve got to simple options; one, use it to cover your subscription service and lottery tickets (everyone’s favorite when you play for FREE!) or two request an electronic transfer. If you take the money there are some transfer fees you pay but what do you care? It’s FREE money…the best kind!
I have friends that I’d like to have join my lottery Universe, what do I do?
Jump up and down and scream like a crazy person! If that doesn’t work we’ve got super easy ways, all digital of course, to attract new Player Moon’s to your lottery Universe.
You guys are corny, what’s with the Universe theme?
Corny, what are we on an episode of Happy Days? Well some people have called me Richie Cunngingham over the years. Just like the Universe, the LottoLishus pool could almost grow to infinity and beyond with its unique design (at least 6 billion anyway). The Universe theme grew out of trying to find an easy way to explain how our pooling software works. Late nights, lot’s of caffeine, lot’s of geeks who like Star Trek, Star Wars, Lost in Space, the Jetsons and wah lah…a cool way to play the lottery and build a pool. Your welcome…ENJOY!
What if I want to cancel my subscription?
Well then we’re really not going to like you anymore, humph. But, if for some strange reason this isn’t the most awesomest thing you’ve ever been a part of in your whole life then we make it simple. All you have to do is uncheck auto-renew on your player dashboard and your subscription will not be renewed. And if you do want to kiss and make up, you’ve got 60 days to restart your current subscription before it’s purged from our system. After that we have to start a brand new relationship. Maybe the second time will be better, just like that girlfriend/boyfriend you went back to. That worked out well I’m sure. We’ll be better…promise.
Do I have to pay taxes on my winnings?
Death and taxes, you’re not escaping either in this universe so be prepared to pay! The good news is the state of California does not charge tax on the free money they are getting from people and giving to you. The bad news is Uncle Sam is not so generous and wants his cut. The good news is your paying tax on FREE money! So share my friends and know that your prosperity is benefiting many. You, schools, and Uncle Sam and all that he supports are all winners!
How do you guys make money?
We sell all your personal information to all the companies that want to buy it for as much as we possibly can. Wait a minute, no, that’s how all the free websites make money. We actually make money the old fashioned way…we provide a phenomenal product, lottery pooling software, along with excellent customer service and our customers reward us because it’s the greatest thing they’ve ever seen! And that kids, his how capitalism is supposed to work.
Who Owns LottoLishus?
Only the coolest guys and gals (nerds) in the world! That’s what our Mom’s told us but they also told us it’s time to move out of the basement too so you be the judge.
Now quit asking so many dang questions and go have some fun growing your LottoLishus Universe and winning some money. And when you hit the jackpot, don’t forget your BFF Dave!